An elderly couple
met for a romp in the broom closet at the nursing home. They undressed and were
about to screw, The woman decided to warn the man of her heart condition."I should
tell you, I have acute angina" she said.
The man replied,"thats good because you have the ugliest breasts I ever seen!"
*
* *
A man is in a hotel
lobby. He wants to ask the clerk a question. As he turns to go to the front desk,
he accidentally bumps into a woman beside him and as he does, his elbow goes into
her breast. They are both quite startled.
The man turns to her and says, "Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast,
I know you'll forgive me."
She replies, "If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 436."
*
* *
A guy comes home
to his wife one evening with a big bunch of flowers and she says "I suppose this
means I have to get on my back with my legs open for the next three days".
The husband says "Why? Don't you have any vases?"
*
* *
A woman walks into
a drugstore and asks the pharmacist if he sells size extra large condoms.
He replies, "Yes we do. Would you like to buy some?"
She responds, "No, but do you mind if I wait around here until someone does?
*
* *
A young couple
on the brink of divorce visit a marriage counsellor. The counsellor asks the wife
what is the problem.
She responds " My husband suffers from premature ejaculation."
The counsellor turns to her husband and inquires "Is that true?"
The husband replies " Well not exactly, it's her that suffers not me."
