A travelling salesman
was about to check in at a hotel when he noticed a very charming bit of femininity
giving him the eye. In a causal manner he walked over and spoke to her as though
he had known her all his life.
Both walked back to the desk and registered as Mr. and Mrs. After a three-day
stay he walked up to the desk and informed the clerk that he was checking out.
The clerk presented him with his bill for $1600.
"There is a mistake here," he protested. "I have been here only three days."
"Yes," replied the clerk, "But your wife has been here a month."
*
* *
Mr. Johnson got
himself a new secretary. She was young, sweet and very polite. One day, while
taking dictation, she noticed his fly was open.
When leaving the room, she said, "Mr. Johnson, your barracks door is open." He
did not understand her remark but later on, he happened to look down and saw that
his zipper was open. He decided to have some fun with his secretary.
Calling her in, he asked, "By the way, Miss Jones, when you saw my barracks door
open this morning, did you also notice a soldier standing at attention?"
The secretary, who was quite witty replied, "Why no sir, all I saw was a little
disabled veteran sitting on two duffel bags."
*
* *
A Koala bear decides
he wants to get laid, so he picks up a hooker. He goes down on her several times
and they are really enjoying themselves. After they are finished the koala bear
starts getting dressed.
The hooker says, "wheres my money?"
The koala bear shrugs his shoulders. The hooker repeats herself asking for her
money. Again he shrugs his shoulders. The hooker grabs a dictionary and looks
up the word hooker and shows it to the koala bear. It says gets paid for sex.
The koala bear picks up the dictionary and looks up Koala Bear and shows it to
the hooker.
It says, "Eats bush and leaves!"
